yes, its an actual blog, and its actually called Goths in Hot Weather, and it kicks ass. Out of my own sense of support and reverence for this hallowed/forlorn project, I would like shout out to GIHW during these last days of summer- the accursèd season of hot sun and bug bites.
but first! To get you in the mood… an interlude from our friends NIN
Great so, Goths in Hot Weather was revealed to me by a buddy sometime in the heat of August, and it really helped me shuffle my sweat and suffering into perspective! What if I had to suffer the noon-time humidity of Philadelphia in laced boots and leather instead of hotpants?! How self-absorbed I had been! There are legions of wan gothic devotees enduring the dual afflictions of summer AND copious black clothing!!! Behold:
(from Goths in Hot Weather)
WELCOME, GOTH LOVER!
Goths, I love ’em! I even used to be one for a bit (well, I was a Didi-Goth for at least 6 months). But there’s one thing that troubles me about our cheery friends: what to do they do in summer? All that makeup, long black leather and rubber must get very sticky. I think we should show our respect for these poor unfortunates, struggling to stand out from the vanilla crowd despite blazing temperatures and sunshine that puts the rest of us in shorts and vest tops. Join me in celebrating the majesty of the Goth, who, eschewing any practicality whatever, still has the commitment to don a full length leather trenchcoat, stupid New Rock boots, and half a Superdrug counter of makeup. All hail the Hot Goth!
Thusly, it begins. A few vignettes are in order. Seriously folks, I think I pissed my pants the first time I read these posts.
Goth Like an Egyptian
Gothiness: 5 Sweatiness: 10
I know it’s the 80’s Mark, but you’re in EGYPT. Wearing a LEATHER JACKET. I’m proud of you.
yep. And next, the newest vocab in my fashionista lexicon, friends of all genders, I’d like to introduce: the Gothkini (exhibit B)
Gothiness: 8 Sweatiness: 9 (crotch area only)
Ladieeeeeez! [and whomever else!] Check out this Goth’s cradle of filth! He’s all man, and he’s waiting to satisfy your every need – poetry, navel gazing, and Terry Pratchett discussion groups with dark sexual chocolate drops on top! Witness the muscular physique! Gasp at the bulging source of his power! Swoon at the bullet belt adorned cowboy boots! This, surely, is every (straight) Gothette’s onanistic, narcissistic gothboy fantasy!
und, finally, Exhibit C:
Come Feast at the Bitter BBQ of Banishment
Gothiness: 7 Sweatiness: 6
Take heed mortal, and fear my warning! Tear your eyes from the alluring glare of this Dark Temptress! Heed not the cool, refreshing can of beer and refuse the promise of delicious pre-prepared kebabs with artichoke hearts from M&S! You can plainly see there’s nothing on this fire – like the Dread Pirate Roberts, this evil succubus waits to barbecue your SOOOUUUUULLLLL! Probably in a nice piri-piri sauce.
and with that… let us join hands and march wistfully into the congenial autumnal weeks which await us, just around the bend. Yes! Its our reward for putting up with blistering winters, pollen-filled springs, and the relentlessness of summer:
WELCOME, BLACK MAPS READERS, TO FALL!
b-b-b-bonus! Goths vs. B-Boys Dance-Off!!!
first of all: holycrapamazing.
second: omg is Skinny Puppy still a band?!
third: you MUST watch the last 10 seconds. Killer!